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But I'm not your boyfriend, and we all tolerate our friends' bullshit in our own ways. Like you, I'd definitely have the WTF talk with my friend, if not a GTFO of my life talk. If you were my girlfriend, I'd have been so pissed off at any dude who crawled into your bed - especially if it was one of my friends, because I'd consider him a disrespectful prick and tell him so. Is this part of his narcissism? Does it say something negative about him, how he feels about me, or our relationship?
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I should also tell you that he was diagnosed as a narcissist about a year ago, though his counselor said he's "cured" (not buying it though). I worry that his lack of jealousy means he doesn't value me or isn't even the slightest bit worried about losing me, even in the hypothetical sense. Not to mention, if one of my girlfriends did this to my fiancé, we would be having a serious "WTF?" talk about it. Don't get me wrong, I love and trust this friend in question, he's one of our best friends, but I did feel very uncomfortable. He was only going to say anything to the friend because I felt uncomfortable. Even the next day after he was sober, no jealousy. When I texted my fiancé, he didn't seem concerned, so I asked him to come home and deal with the situation. I was wine drunk and sleeping, so the whole thing was really confusing. His friend begged me to kiss him, then to cuddle.
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My fiancé never gets jealous, even when one of his friends came home from the bar before him and came and lay in our bed (our door has a lock code and most of our close friends know it). Are you nervous? Happy? Anxious? Horny? All those things at once? If he knows where you're coming from, he'll be more likely to respond in a way that makes the experience more comfortable - and better - for both of you.
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And be honest about how you feel, even if talking about it makes you feel vulnerable. Just tell him you feel awkward but you need to tell him something: You've never had sex. You don't have to give him your entire autobiography and dating history in a one-woman show. If you decide to tell him, just keep it simple. If you're honest, he'll be able to be more understanding of your insecurity and your excitement. The cliché is true: Communication is important when it comes to sex, especially if you care about someone, and it seems you do. That said, I'm all for honesty, particularly when you're thinking about doing something as significant as having sex for the first time. It's your body, and it's always your right to share information about your sex life - or keep it to yourself - anytime you'd like. Whether you tell him or not is ultimately your call and nobody else's. I feel I'm ready to sleep with him, but should I tell him first? If so, how do I bring it up? We're getting on really well, and our relationship is progressing fast. Should you tell a guy you're a virgin before you sleep with him? I'm 23, and the guy I'm seeing now is 27.